Church Elder Arrested as Galamsey Foreman: The Lord’s Work Took a Detour Through the Rivers.

church of pentecost elder galamsey foreman arrested kume river ashanti ghana satire

The National Anti-Illegal Mining Operations Secretariat (NAIMOS) has arrested the galamsey foreman of an illegal mining site at Akyem Morso near Juaso. The suspect, Elder David Bobie Peter, is a Church of Pentecost elder at Konongo—the church of pentecost elder turned galamsey foreman whose employer, a certain Mr. Appiah, dispatched him to verify if the NAIMOS task force had actually arrived. He, as a staunch christian for many years, believed he could walk to hell and come back home with no consequence.

And for refusing to say no to his boss for the first time, he walked straight into the NAIMOS, dressed in a yellow T-shirt and white shorts, and claimed he was visiting his farm.

However, the farm, as it turned out, was an illegal mining enclave where eight Chanfang machines were burning, twelve water pumps were being seized, and the Kume River had been diverted from its natural course, much like a church committee rerouting offering funds.

Put this into a simple context: Mr. Bobie was home when the task force raided the illegal mining site. Somehow, he decided to borrow the spirit of Biblical Thomas and go confirm, on the order of Mr. Appiah, if indeed what he heard was true. As a consequence, he got caught pants down.

The Elder Who Farmed Excavators

Let us be clear about what an Elder of a church is supposed to do. An Elder is not a pastor. He is a lay leader. An Elder is appointed because he may have demonstrated maturity, spiritual discipline, and the kind of moral seriousness that makes the younger men adjust their collars when the Elder walks past.

An Elder is not supposed to be dispatched by a man named Mr. Appiah to check if the task force has arrived at the scene of a crime. An Elder is not supposed to lead a task force to his own illegal mining site where the river has been turned into a brown, chemical soup. An Elder is not supposed to have excavators under his supervision unless those excavators are digging a foundation for a new church auditorium, and even then, the District Pastor would like a word about the budget.

church of pentecost elder galamsey foreman arrested kume river ashanti ghana satire
An empty church interior

Elder David Bobie Peter did all of these things. And when he was caught, he did what any good Pentecostal man would do: he confessed. He led the task force to the site, showed them the second excavator, and told them about Mr. Appiah.

The confession was thorough. The problem is that the confession took place after he was already standing in the middle of a crime scene wearing a yellow T-shirt and white shorts, looking like a man who got dressed under the moonlight.

The Chairman Said No. The Elder Said Yes.

Just days before this arrest, the Chairman of The Church of Pentecost, Apostle Eric Nyamekye, had delivered a devastating address at the 48th General Conference. He announced that the church could no longer use rivers for baptism because the water bodies are too polluted. “The extensive pollution of water bodies due to illegal mining has hampered traditional water baptism in some mining communities,” he said. The church will instead use dedicated baptistries at central assemblies.

The Chairman said illegal mining is an environmental sabotage. Further, he said Christians must protect the environment as a responsibility. His statement was precise, moral, and heartbreaking to the core.

The Chairman was speaking as the head of the most populous church in Ghana. Meanwhile, Elder David Bobie Peter, a member of the same church, got caught and confessed from a riverbank, just a week later. When the Chairman said no to galamsey, the Elder said yes to it in the loudest way.

There is a word for this in church disciplinary committees. The word is “backsliding.” But backsliding is usually about adultery or drunkenness or missing service three Sundays in a row. Backsliding is not usually about operating a Chanfang machine in a protected waterway while wearing a yellow T-shirt that says “Jesus Is Lord” on the back.

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And Julius Wept for Mary

This is where the story takes a turn even stranger than a church elder playing foreman at a galamsey site.

When Apostle Nyamekye made his statement, a government appointee, Dr. Mary Awusi, CEO of the Ghana Free Zones Authority, went on Accra FM and warned the Chairman. She said he should not “stoop so low to that level” and that if he “behaves like a politician, we will deal with him as a politician.” She asked whether the Chairman had spoken out when rivers were polluted under the previous government.

The backlash was immediate. The Christian Council called her comments “unacceptable” and an “attack” on the clergy. The Catholic Bishops’ Conference said equating moral advocacy with partisan politics “risks undermining constructive public discourse.” An MP gave her 48 hours to apologise.

She coiled and apologised for her unsavoury remarks few days later. Not anyone could stand on business like Elder Bobie.

And then came the tears. Whose tears were they?

church of pentecost elder galamsey foreman arrested kume river ashanti ghana satire
And Julius wept in front of the congregation and cameras

On Sunday, April 26, at the Pentecost International Worship Centre in Trassaco, Chief of Staff Julius Debrah stood before the congregation during his birthday thanksgiving service, and broke down in tears. He wept, and begged the Chairman for forgiveness on behalf of Dr. Awusi. “A few days ago, one of our colleagues, Dr. Mary Awusi, slipped a bit against you,” he said, visibly emotional. “It wasn’t intentionally done to malign our church. I believe sincerely that you will forgive her.”

He wept for Mary. The tears were real, or maybe not, but the apology was televised. The congregation watched a government official cry over a comment made about rivers.

However, anyone familiar with political scriptures would understand why Julius wept in public for all to see.

Apostle Nyamekye responded with grace. He forgave her. I mean, who wouldn’t forgive after seeing those expensive tears? He even joked that “she has made the church more popular.” And then he led a prayer for Julius Debrah. They prayed for long life, wisdom, and divine protection.

It is worthy to note that, the Chairman forgave, and the church moved on. Meanwhile, the polluted waterbodies did not move on, the Elder did not move on. The unholy matrimony continued without any shame.

The Foreman’s Theology

Here is what Elder David Bobie Peter believed, apparently. He believed that galamsey is a sin, but only when you are caught. He believed that the Church of Pentecost has a strong environmental policy, and believed the policy applied specifically to other members. He also believed that Mr. Appiah’s instructions superseded the instructions of the chairman of his denomination. He believed that a yellow T-shirt and white shorts are appropriate attire for reconnaissance. Finally, he believed that “visiting my farm” is a credible alibi when the farm has been replaced by a mining pit.

He was wrong on all counts. The task force did not laugh. The task force did not pray with him. They removed the oil pumps from the excavators and handed him over to the Konongo District Police Station.

The police will process him, and the court will hear his case. Also, the Church will most likely defrock him.

The Punchline No One Is Laughing At

Elder David Bobie Peter was an Elder, and may have lead prayer points against galamsey. He perhaps underestimated the saying: “Do not bite the hands that feed you,” and prayed vigorously in a performance that God could not ignore. Finally, God listened as He mostly does, and the Elder was apprehended in an incredible fashion.

He was supposed to be an example to the other men in the congregation. Instead, he led a task force to his own illegal mining site. His excavator reportedly had its monitor removed, suggesting he had considerable worth of experience in camouflaging authority.

Now to the weeper of the year, Julius Debrah, who funnily wept for a government appointee when he was supposed to assure Ghanaians that the government would end galamsey at all costs. It is the single most political thing to do at the time. Do everything else but solve the actual problem Ghanaians want you to solve.

But In all of this, one thing was confirmed: Julius’s tears were not brown, they were clean and not polluted, but we can’t say same for the water bodies we depend on.

The Brewed Satire.

Disclaimer: Exaggerated for a satiric purpose

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